Monday 8th January 

Did some charity shopping, everything 1/2 price!

Tuesday 9th January

Trip to Manchester

Wednesday 10th January

Doctors visits and Monopoly games

Thursday 11th January


Friday 12th/Saturday 13th January

A mish mash of feeling ill


Monday was the day I started healthy living as I had this thought that put everything in perspective.
There are some parts of my health that I have no control over but there are many parts that I do, I decided I am determined to control of my health and fitness and build myself up again. Me and my Mum popped down to the local Charity Shop where everything was 1/2 price which meant spending only £9 on a variation of coats, dresses and tops!
I started watching 'The end of the fucking world' and I am OBSESSED.

Tuesday was a trip to Manchester which was a first for me in a long while. Prior to being ill, going to Manchester was almost a weekly if not daily occurrence. I'd always be there to shop, for nights out and I spent a good few months working in the city. It was a place I was so confident to be in, it felt like home. Venturing there now holds a lot of anxiety for me. Even though I know the city, I can feel really lost and overwhelmed because I feel so different being there now.
Nevertheless, I managed to get there on Tuesday and had the most wonderful day out with my Mum which I must say, I am pretty proud of.

Wednesday I allowed myself a looooong sleep which meant sleeping until 12. If you didn't know, I have Ulcerative Colitis and a symptom I get almost all the time is general fatigue. I could sleep for hours on end and still be tired, it's not fun. I got up, went on my exercise bike and did some workout videos. My evening started with a Doctors consultation which wasn't too bad, I will be making a new post updating 'My Disease' as there is lots to talk about. I then spent my night with some of my favourite people playing Monopoly and saying goodbye before they leave for uni :(

Thursday was photoshoot day with Ell! I woke up, did my workout and then got everything ready to shoot with Ell. I haven't done much photography over these last few months which does make me really sad, it's something I am so passionate about and adore doing so I knew in 2018 I wanted to get back into it. I opted for a 70s theme for the shoots and they will be coming to my blog very soon!

So Friday wasn't the greatest day, I came off steroid medication on Wednesday which had been keeping me reasonably well and the effect of no steroids hit me Friday. To put it politely, it was a day spent in bed, asleep or on the loo. 
Not all days can be 10/10.

Saturday I woke up hoping that Friday had just been a bad day, but within the first few hours I knew it was here to stay. I did manage to get a work out in as I was trying everything possible to make me feel a bit better as I wanted to go out that night. Unfortunately, I wasn't up for it. I managed to get a last minute appointment with my GP who wrote me a prescription of some more medication that is supposed to help in a flare up. After a trip to the late night pharmacy, I found out I couldn't get it till Monday which is fine, I'll just stay in bed till then.

I'm writing this on Sunday and have pretty much stayed in bed all day but I refuse to feel guilty about it. I used to get so angry with myself if I didn't fulfil my days but now I'm learning to just accept it. My disease is not yet fully under control so I have to expect good days and bad days in my week as if I pushed myself to try and make them all good, I would fall apart. 
One thing about the first 4 days of this week was that I actually felt quite normal again, I felt like life had fallen back into place. It's given me a glimmer of hope of what life can be like when I reach remission, I need that to be soon.

Lucy Jane